Why Transracial Adoption Is Good For The World
Fly fishing has always piqued my interest, so I was excited this past weekend as I was introduced to a fly fishing instructor -- a Black teenager (yes, Black teenager) from Saratoga, Wyoming. Highly improbable right? Well let me explain. For the second consecutive year, I was invited to speak at Colorado’s African/Caribbean Heritage Camp. Since my attendance at last year’s camp, I had looked forward to the event all year. Asked to give my thoughts on how to prepare Black adolescents for today’s challenges, I always seem to get more out of this retreat than I could ever contribute. This annual congregation of adoptive families, with their racially diverse children, has shown me a side of humanity that is rarely witnessed by the general public.
Last year the camp was held in a remote village in the midst of Colorado’s Rockie Mountains. Doug Tallman and his wife Gretchen found me online via Great Black Speakers. I was honored to attend and deliver my entrepreneurial message on being the “Master of Your Fate, Captain of Your Soul.” While I was hoping to have a positive impact on the camp attendees, I had no idea they would in turn change my life significantly. As I was embraced by White American families for my advice on how to motivate their Black children, the overwhelming sense of love I experienced was amazing. “This is how the world should look,” I thought. People disregarding society’s perceived barriers of race in order to devote themselves to improving the lives of those less fortunate. I listened to the stories of African children adopted from the brink of starvation and murder. Formerly left to fend for themselves in foster care and orphanages, I also watched African American kids play with Caribbean American kids to endless enjoyment. Yes, I observed how the eyes of their melaninly challenged parents twinkled as they sought ideas to improve the quality of life for their children. For the first time I understood what unconditional love was.
This year I asked to hold a greater role in my camp participation. Not only did I come to Denver prepared with my latest lecture “The Black Scholar’s Responsibility to America,” I also volunteered to sit on two racial slurs panels for candid race discussions. Once again I left feeling like I had greatly benefited from my attendance at the camp. Hearing numerous stories about what White parents with Black children deal with on a consistent basis, my eyes were opened to how prevalent ignorance is in many portions of the United States. I now see my greater duty in combating these degenerate mentalities.
The issue of transracial adoption has caused a furious debate among Black and White intellectuals. There are those who oppose the practice out of fear that Black children lose their racial identity when raised by White parents. Others feel that White parents should continue White supremacist ideology by only assisting children of their own race.
Both of these arguments are plain pitiful. How could any Black scholar advocate that African American children remain in America’s oppressive foster care system until a Black family sees fit to adopt? There exists no magical line of Negroes waiting patiently to adopt a Black child, so how could anyone oppose these children going to the home of a loving family of a different color? Many people have pointed at Angelina Jolie and accused her of exploiting the children she adopts from abroad. Umm, what? I have been to Africa and seen the utter depths of poverty that exist. If a White American is willing to sacrifice their life to save an African child from a bleak situation, why should anyone be opposed? What is the alternative solution, let the child suffer because you feel transracial adoption is merely a fad? What’s most amusing about the opponents of transracial adoption is the fact that these people are 1. not adopting children themselves, and 2. have not been raised in a transracial household. Therefore, unless they have lived this themselves, they speak from a platform of ignorance.
I have seen the beauty of transracial adoption first hand. I’m about to learn how to fly fish for goodness sake! I personally know wonderful White parents that are raising gifted Black children with a sense of responsibility for changing America’s racial paradigm. Of course there are difficulties in doing so; the difficulties lie in navigating the pervasive stubborness of other Americans who choose not to look beyond skin color. It’s time to grow up America, embrace transracial adoption. Continuing to oppose this practice will only feed perpetual cycles of inequality and ignorance. Race is just a pigment of our imagination.
15 Responses to “Why Transracial Adoption Is Good For The World”
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Demetrius,
Your concept on not becoming one to empower the “N” word is brilliant and could be a movement that could completely demolish the derogatory purpose. The ignorance has infected many in our lifetime, so changing the mental culture of the masses will be tough but each of us has sole control of what we empower and can change those in our own world. THANK YOU for being an inspiration to those parents and it is my hope that your attendance at the camp is one of longevity.
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Demetrius,
Applause! Applause! Thank you for this article. I appreciate it more each time I read it.
“…the difficulties lie in navigating the pervasive stubborness of other Americans who choose not to look beyond skin color.” This, to me, is the pivotal challenge, and one I believe we must overcome one slur, one tasteless joke, one conversation, one neighborhood at a time.
“Melaninly challenged” – I’m still laughing!
Please excuse my website address error in my previous reply. It is http://www.theadoptiveparent.com
We may be writing to the convereted here, but anyway, please see the link >
http://about-orphans.blogspot.com
Demetrius,
You are a very intelligent young man and very articulate, and I a, very glad that you have had such a wonderful life.
However, you are generalizing your experience a bit. Not all interracial adoptee feel as you do. To get a different perspective I urge you to read:
http://www.transracialabductees.org/email.html and some of the works of Jane Jeong Trenka, such as The Language of Blood and Outsiders Within.
I would also like to point a fallacy in your argument. You ask: “How could any Black scholar advocate that African American children remain in America’s oppressive foster care system until a Black family sees fit to adopt?”
This is as wrong a question as is suggesting that if you – or any other adopted person had not been adopted they’d have been aborted (which many pro-life campaigns portray) !
No, foster care is not the alternative on which to base your speculation. The real questions is this:
Would you have preferred to have been raised by any non-related family (especially one of different culture, ethnicity and race) or within your extended kinship group?
Would you have not preferred that someone had provided someone within your extended family the resources to care for you, such as that which that foster parents receive? They suffered a loss, too.
According to the United Nations, adoption should always be a last resort after all resources to keep families intact are exhausted. Isn’t that more moral and ethical than redistributing children globally — taking children of the poor away from them and giving them to those who are more financially stable? Taking children from the young and giving them to the more mature? Taking children from their culture – and many form their language – and having them lose their actual connections — not a history of “your people” you can learn n a text book?
Do you have any contact with any of your family of origins? Do you long to? It’s OK to want to know the truth of your heritage without disrespecting those who raised you or feeling any less loved by them. It is no different than falling in love and marrying. We are all capable of loving many people in many different ways, Parents love multiple children. Children love at least two sets of grandparents and aunts, uncles etc. It’s all good! Love is not a limited resource!
I wish you well, Demetrius, and hope you expand your education to include the experiences of other transracial adpteees.
Mirah Riben, author, “The Stork Market: America’s Multi-Billion Dollar Unregulated Adoption Industry”
http://wwww.FamilyPreservation.blogpsot.com
Mirah,
Thank you for your intelligent response. However, I disagree with you on several levels. First of all, you make it seem as though these children are unwillingly snatched out of the hands of their birth parents. This is far from the truth. No one travels overseas and handpicks a baby and forces the parents to fork the kid over. Nobody is “taking” these children as you described. Many of them have lost their birth parents to war, famine, disease, or neglect.
In response to your question “Would you have preferred to have been raised by any non-related family (especially one of different culture, ethnicity and race) or within your extended kinship group?” my answer is I would have preferred to be raised by whoever was willing to love me unconditionally as their child. I would prefer that to spending my life as an orphan, languishing in foster care, ending up in a group home, or dying in the streets of America or abroad.
You are right when you say “It’s OK to want to know the truth of your heritage without disrespecting those who raised you or feeling any less loved by them.” I totally agree, as that is the whole point of the African Caribbean Heritage Camp – to embrace these childrens’ native cultures so they can be proud of their origins in environments where this is typically difficult.
I’m sure there are many adoptees that have varying experiences, just as children raised by their birth families can cite issues they wish could have been different. Not all parents are perfect and I am sure there are some who adopt for the wrong reasons. Even still, it is not fair to admonish all families that adopt children of a different race due to the fact that some parents did not equip themselves with the resources to bridge two cultures.
Had you attended the camp you would have seen success stories. You would have seen parents that go out of their way to promote the social consciousness and racial identity of their adopted children. You would have met children that would not change their experience for the world. I encourage you to interview these camp attendees so that you can offer the world a positive perspective on how transracial adoption should be handled.
Demitrius,
Adoption, as a whole “takes” or moves children form the poor to more affluent families. This provides them with more material advantages. But, as I said some of those who have been transplanted internationally and/or transracially are grateful but also cognizant of what they’ve lost, despie ample immersion in cultural programs such as the camp you attend. I hope you will read tHEIR words, not just mine as I have not experienced this myself, they have.
Sadly, children are stolen and kidnapped and trafficked into international all around the world.
Sadly, the children in orphanages and foster care are left there while baby brokers fill demands for younger, healthier children.
Unless you were adopted from foster care, why assume what the alternative would have been for you until you hopefully meet and know YOUR family members? Strange things have caused children to be placed for adoption – even domestically, which is what you are more knowledgeable of.
The camp you attend encourages knowledge and positive attitudes about your culture – but it is not the same as actually reunifying with actual kin.
If you’d like to broaden your knowledge base to include more about international adoption, I encourage you to read:
http://tinyurl.com/adoptionresources
Child trafficking for adoption and kidnapped children world-wide are irrefutable, verified and well known facts, not my opinion – with you might agree or disagree – and not something I have conjured up.
I hope I have explained my use of the word “taken” for adoption more clearly. Every adoption represents a tragic loss – a family torn apart by poverty or other causes. You can, however, piece back together your very own personal ROOTS, if you chose to. Your parents may likely even have your original name! If you were in foster care they may remember your foster family’s name.
Best of luck. I know you will do well and succeed in anything you work at!
Nice article. Its refreshing to know camps like this even exist!
Mirah,
In no way do I condone illegal human trafficking. I am aware of this issue at home and abroad. Obviously great care needs to be taken to eliminate this practice.
There are plenty of people who adopt children the right way and care for them unconditionally. These are the people I admire and praise.
I also disagree with your definition for adoption as a whole; in most cases adoption does not take children from poor families and move them to more affluent families. Adoption typically moves kids with NO family to a a place with A family. I have investigated the links you provided previously and I am not convinced they are more than a few hateful testimonials used to promote a certain agenda. They don’t seem to be credible resources that substantiate your claims.
As I mentioned before, I am sure there are horror stories that can be cited in some cases of transracial adoption. I do not believe this is the norm however. I feel you could do more good by helping to promote the virtues of camps like the one I attended instead of bantering about the destruction of transracial adoption. You should be more concerned with families raising good human beings, not just good African, Asian, or Caucasian children.
Demetrius,
I met you at this camp and was very impressed with you. I applaud this article and your responses even more so. Please continue to educate and speak out! I hope to see you at camp next year.
You are 100% correct.
Children are legally kidnapped by the state agents and trafficked to people called “adopters”. Judges rubberstamp the adoptions- even though there is no care order in place to remove the child.
Georgia Tann The Baby Thief and her crew of trafficers led the way to this legalised trafficing.
It is “legal” but it is not lawful.
Those who have done the research like Dr Wrennell who point out the damage done to the natural mother, family and the adoptee is horrendous.
What about the vietnamese children adopted into Ireland, when the Jesuits wanted to destroy buddhism.
Do you realise how many of these vietnamese children committed suicide as teenagers and as adults.
The bond between every child and its natural family is invisible but it exists as do family karmic trails etc…. because the child CHOOSE ITS PARENTS BEFORE BEING BORN….and all we humans do is create an industry out of innocent children.
Those who adopt are mostly needy adults or brainwashed by the media to believe they are doing good.
What if these so called caring adopters actually adopted the entire family and support it financially and watch the children grow in their natural environment.
Would not that be something to see…instead of all the middle men and women lining their pockets from legalised child trafficking.
That is human brothers and sisters working together and not for money.
Adoption industry is another form of slavery- dressed up to look good, but it is still slave trading.
“if a White American is willing to sacrifice their life to save an African child from a bleak situation, why should anyone be opposed?”
Hold on a minute…..SACRAFICE !!!!
and SAVE.???
You got it so wrong- there is more chance of the poor black child saving the rich white American, assuming you understand what save really means.
Reading the above tell me that one who believes he is sacraficing him or herself to save a poor child is not doing anything from his or her HEART AND SOUL.
Talk about EGO and propaganda.
Posting a link to this very interesting view of transnational adoption, hope that’s ok.